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gabryposhboy:

PRAY FOR OKLAHOMA #oklahoma #prayforoklahoma
reddirtroadgirl:

well, load your shotguns…
missmandimichelle:

More like I finally got so healthy that my ass looks great even in sweatpants. Hollaaaa!
whiskeyondeck:

this seriously just happened.
  • (I’m running errands for my pregnant wife. While walking to a nearby store, I see two teenagers harassing a child that is only four or five years old. I shoo them away from the boy, and he introduces himself.)
  • Me: “So, where’s your mom at?”
  • Boy: “She’s in the store. Do you have kids?”
  • Me: “Not yet. We’re expecting a baby girl soon, though.”
  • Boy: “Well, she’s going to turn out nice, like you! So, I’m going to marry her someday!”
  • (I laugh, and play along while I bring him to the service desk, and wait until his mom picks him up. Six years later, my daughter comes home from school and introduces us to a friend that defended her against a bully on the playground. I didn’t recognize him, but he certainly knew who I was!)

megaman2:

megaman2:

“mickey mouse it says you want to divorce minnie because she was…… extremely silly?”

“no, i said she was fucking goofy”

please stop reblogging this i stole this joke from my brother

laughfloor:

where’s the fucking rent
pokec0re:

river by zemen,u on Flickr.
radhauswife:

This is amazing.
psychofactz:

More Facts on Psychofacts :)
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